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I'm going to share with you some common ways to help things at the start. In my opinion what happens first is that "communication" breaks down, then "the power and control" game steps in; all out "war" follows after that. The power and control game will be discussed in following pages. Let's say you have a problem communicating with someone. Here's an exercise that may help, but not in all situations! COMMUNICATION EXERCISE Have one person write out on a piece of paper (a large one) what he feels, what he would like, and what he thinks need to be done. (Let the man go first, woman are better communicators usually). The second person reads and then writes (this is a written exercise only, no talking) what she feels about what the first person has written (first read, then interpret, then express). Writing out what she (the second person) thinks what the first person has said, but re-write it in her (the second person) own words. Then the second person writes out what she is feeling, what she would like, and what she thinks should be done. The process then repeats itself. The first person reads, re-writes & expresses. Having each person reads, re-writes his/her interpretation of what he/she feels the other person is saying, then express what he/she feels himself/herself. It's very important to re-write what you think the other person is saying, so you can put in you own words what you think the other person is feeling. This will show some of the ways miscommunication is happening. Writing it all out helps keep the shouting out of the communication process. Reading the many pieces of paper that results from the beginning to the end again, will sometimes show some enlightenment. Keep all of the written pages for future reference. It's much better if both parties participate willingly. Don't make somebody do it. Recommend it! Wait until they feel like doing it. Doing it first yourself might help. Try to write constructive statements, not degrading statements that will only anger and degrade the other person (a “form” of abuse in itself). Please use caution. Some people are very uncontrollable. Seek professional help. These suggestions won’t help everyone in all situations. Don’t put yourself at risk in a bad situations. ~Written by- Richard Giroux Go to next page on abuse Next pages on abuse....Reason For Actions Problems Therapy Power & Control Protecting Yourself Reality & Truths The following is a personal opinion only. Use caution in doing the exercise below. Always consult professional help. I disavow any and all legal responsibilities for the abuse caused by others. If in danger, contact the police. |
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